Let’s Talk Like Ladies

On the eve of International Women’s Day I would like to introduce a new series to the blog called ‘Let’s Talk Like Ladies’. I love being a woman and I want to celebrate that but also sometimes I want to rant about it or just talk through my feelings on certain topics and issues. When I started the blog my main goal was to create a space that was reflective of myself and my interests and including these ‘fem-talk’ type posts is a part of that.

And so to kick things off I would like to talk about last nights episode of the Bachelor – specifically, the Women Tell All portion of the evening. If you’ve been following this season than I think it comes as no surprise that most of the show revolved around the conflict surrounding Corrine and Taylor. What did really surprise me though was the narrative surrounding the conflict. I would like to preface what I’m about to say by first stating that I don’t think either Corrine or Taylor are bad people. I don’t hate them and I certainly don’t judge them. I sometimes think about what I would be like in that situation and I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t look or act like my absolute best self, either (if we’re being real I’d probably go a little crazy on that show).

Having said that though, I’m feeling awfully disappointed in how the situation was handled. Obviously I know that the show isn’t critically acclaimed for it’s feminist principles (let’s be honest – it’s trash TV and that’s why we love it). But in an episode where not ten minutes before the entire cast and audience were praising the acceptance of women and how we should all stop slut-shaming (which, yes, we definitely should), I think I was just hoping for something else. The entire fight between Corrine and Taylor was stupid, and to be honest, they both behaved stupidly. But while Corrine got turned in to a bonafide celebrity and is praised for how funny and real she is, Taylor got called a bully and was attacked on national TV. Something about that just doesn’t seem fair. To be clear, I’m not saying that Taylor was right or anything like that. I’m just saying that they both engaged in this dumb argument (I swear, I never want to hear the words ’emotional intelligence’ ever again) and they should both be held accountable. We all saw what they were saying about each other; there is no pretending that either of them are innocent. But if we’re going to talk about building each other up instead of tearing each other down than it’s only fair that they both share the responsibility for their actions.

It also made me super uncomfortable that people started attacking Taylor and her vocation as a mental health counsellor. Guess what, guys? Mental health counsellors are people, too. And they’re allowed to not like people – that doesn’t make them bad at their jobs. You can have a personal life that’s separate from your work. I think it’s really interesting that people are talking about Corrine and how it’s not fair to judge her as a real person based on how she behaved or was portrayed in that experience. They’re totally right; the Bachelor is super weird and kind of in it’s own little bubble that is separate from real life. It’s not fair to assume anything about the character of any of the girls on the show. But people aren’t so forgiving of Taylor which just seems like a double standard and for what? Because she wasn’t as entertaining or funny as Corrine? That’s just so ridiculous to me.

I guess what I’m getting at here is that I wish that people could see how looking for someone to ‘blame’ for the conflict only perpetuates this idea that women must compete against each other and continues to tear women down. It hurts me that women are so willing to be accepting of each other in certain situations and not others. I think that the world was able to ‘forgive’ Corrine and they should also forgive Taylor and then we should all move on. And if you still want to be team Corrine because you love naps, have at it my friends.

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